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My parents situation

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  • mr_sotong's Avatar
    9,675 posts since Sep '03
    • this is what had happened to my parents. let me start from the beginning.

      couple of months ago, my parents had a cold war. both of  them refuse to talk to each others. there was once my mum shouted she wanted a divorce while my dad was in the bedroom. i'm not clear what had happened to them that time. so after a couple of weeks, they patched this up again.

      but, after a few more weeks. my dad invited a female insurance agent to our house to talk about some polices. my mum was at home that time. after the agent finished discussing, she wanted to buy "dont know what thing", so my dad know where to get it, he accompany the agent to the shopping mall to get it.

      when my dad get home, my mum started screaming "You(her kids) will be getting a new mum). while my dad kept quiet. after that, my mum when to kitchen n start breaking all the drinking mugs while shouting vulgarities. and so, after a few weeks, they patched up again.

       they started everything again since about 2 months ago. my mum keep telling my sis that my dad treat the agent meals. which i dont know how true was it.

      and now, everything get out of control, jus an hour ago, my mum threw knives in front of my dad when he was reading newspaper while my dad still keeping his cool.

       

       

  • Moo Haa Haa !
    Ferret's Avatar
    36,474 posts since Jul '00
  • mr_sotong's Avatar
    9,675 posts since Sep '03
  • ulquiorra87's Avatar
    176 posts since Jan '07
    • Wao i'm sorry to hear that.. THis situation is out of your hands u'll just have to bear with it until you're of age to move out, which i hope is soon.

  • rokkie's Avatar
    821 posts since Mar '08
    • anyway divorce is not so bad, until then, it's not about what you say to your mum and dad, it's between them, how they solve they problem is up to them, but i think your mum is a bit sensitive, maybe your father really just want to buy insurance or just customer and client relation,

  • SevenEleven's Avatar
    3,416 posts since Aug '05
    • i'm sorry to hear that and also sorry that the children had to be in the middle of the suitation. Anyway, you will have to leave it to the adult to solve the problems.

      icon_frown.gif

  • mr_sotong's Avatar
    9,675 posts since Sep '03
    • i had tried not to be bother my them. but sometimes, suicide, murder or whatever shit will come to my mind.icon_sad.gif

  • rokkie's Avatar
    821 posts since Mar '08
    • talk to your mum more, listen to her, maybe her talked more, then her mood will be smoothed, is it called middle age crisis?

  • rokkie's Avatar
    821 posts since Mar '08
    • you really need to talk and listen to her more, talking will ease her mood, then she will no longer quarell with your father

  • mr_sotong's Avatar
    9,675 posts since Sep '03
  • rokkie's Avatar
    821 posts since Mar '08
    • that's why you should do better, my mum used to be like this too, so you must be really really cool, just talk and listen, talking is always the best medicine.

  • Karma88's Avatar
    1,070 posts since Mar '08
    • Omg this is bad .

      I think divorce is the only way out .

      If ur brothers and sisters are all grown up . I dont think it`ll a big problem . At least divorce already both side happy .

  • *ahem*
    littlestream's Avatar
    19,486 posts since Apr '05
    • sorry to hear.  it seems your mum is feeling insecure hence her suspicion about your dad.  but honestly, we don't really know why she is feeling that way.  is it really menopause or there have been reasons for her to be feeling what she feels.

      communication, patience and support will be very important during this period.  it can be tiring but i hope you and siblings can comfort your mum.  and as the solution to their issue, only your parents can deal with it.  but they need to have a clear head to do that.  and if your mum is feeling out of control, it may be difficult for her to be rational.  hence, support is key for her.  to balance her with her thoughts.

      don't give up.  we go through many trials in life and with each hurdle that we jumped, we become stronger.

      stay strong and hang in there.  all the best to your parents in resolving their current issue.

      God bless!

  • mancha's Avatar
    3,183 posts since Sep '04
    • Let it be.

      Unless you dad comes to you for advice. Then you tell him what you think he should or could do.

      If your mum comes to you for help, then you tell her what you think she should or could do.

      Other than that, you only need to watch that they do not injure each other.

      Why should they fit into your notion of a good marriage?

      They have a marriage, whether it is good or not good, its you who is judging.

      And you judge according to what you have learnt. And you learnt that every thing have to be namby pamby "pleasant". Not necessary so. Emotions are neither bad nor good, they are just emotions, but we categorise them as bad or good, according its desirability. Each person have their own standards.

      Your dad knows your mum, and vice versa.

      Let them be.

  • jojobeach's Avatar
    4,307 posts since Apr '07
    •  

      Your dad is going through a mid life crisis.

      And your mom is upset because she thinks he is going to abandon her.

      Even if he knows where to buy the stuff.. he could have just given the agent the address and location of the store where the stuff can be bought.

      There is no need for him to "accompany" the female agent all the way to the store.

      I suggest you have a chat with your father.

      Chances are.. your father is doing all these "insensitive" things to piss your mother off.. so she will initiate a divorce.

       

       

      Edited by jojobeach 26 Sep `08, 11:28PM
  • mr_sotong's Avatar
    9,675 posts since Sep '03
    • now my dad went out. i dont know where he is going. he just left the house.

       

      ok. now i'll wash my hands off it. n watch them killing each other. 

  • TalkToTheScreen's Avatar
    238 posts since May '08
    • Eh. It's serious. If it's possible, i think it's better for you to talk to the both of them.

      Better still, ask them to go for counselling, which i don't they will wanna go. Still, try to talk to them, if not i'm seriously worried about what will happen to you or your parents.

  • mr_sotong's Avatar
    9,675 posts since Sep '03
    • counselling? 1 work for 6 n half day weekly. and the other 1 always not at home the whole afternoon every day.

      what they are doing right now make me dont wanna stay at home.

  • mr_sotong's Avatar
    9,675 posts since Sep '03
    • oh yes. maybe i could just jump off the building in order to make them realising what they are doing.

  • KaurexO_o's Avatar
    227 posts since Sep '08
    • Don't. It's not worth dying just because of this. 

      Get your sis to speak to your mum and you try speaking to your dad bah. Sometimes we as children can do nothing much to solve the problems between adults. sigh.

  • limegreenRay's Avatar
    11 posts since Jun '08
    • Hmm..i guess there's a hotline to call for help de..u can talk to them and they are professionally train..

      so they can at least give u advice and suggestion or at least listen to ur prob..

      and if there's a need they might give u real action..as in ask ppl to go to ur house to help them..

      Anyone can supply the hotline for tt? I will try to search for u..

  • KaurexO_o's Avatar
    227 posts since Sep '08
    • Originally posted by limegreenRay:

      Hmm..i guess there's a hotline to call for help de..u can talk to them and they are professionally train..

      so they can at least give u advice and suggestion or at least listen to ur prob..

      and if there's a need they might give u real action..as in ask ppl to go to ur house to help them..

      Anyone can supply the hotline for tt? I will try to search for u..


      i believe it is available in the forum icon_biggrin.gif

  • limegreenRay's Avatar
    11 posts since Jun '08
  • KaurexO_o's Avatar
    227 posts since Sep '08
  • limegreenRay's Avatar
    11 posts since Jun '08
    • Wow..tt's cool~ Hey i guess this may be able to help u out bah..Dun feel so destress abt it..every family have their own prob..jus say it out..every prob will have a solution..

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